Succulents and cacti aren’t “no care” - they’re “low fuss if set up right.”

Solve the big three—more light than you think, a mix that stays airy, and a watering routine that’s generous and then patient—and everything else gets easy: compact shapes, richer colour, fewer dramas.

But before we dive in, quick definitions: succulents are any plants that store water in thickened leaves, stems, or roots (think Haworthia, Gasteria, Echeveria, Aloe, Crassula, Euphorbia, Lithops). Cacti are a subset of succulents that have areoles—the tiny padded dots where spines, flowers, and new growth emerge (Echinopsis, Gymnocalycium, Opuntia, columnars, etc.).

All cacti are succulents; not all succulents are cacti. Same big principles, slightly different appetites for light and dryness.

Light Comes First (Short, Real, No Gimmicks)

Most problems are light problems in disguise. In Australian homes, a north-facing window is your engine room; west is excellent in winter; east suits softer succulents (Haworthia, Gasteria). South is tough—press shade-tolerant plants right to the glass and assume you’ll still need help.

Quick test: hold your hand over the bench. Crisp shadow = great; fuzzy = borderline; no shadow = too dim. When upgrading light (indoors → balcony; deep room → sunny sill), harden over 7–14 days to avoid scorch.

If you add a lamp, buy reality, not vibes. Look at actual watt draw from the wall and distance:

• Soft succulents near a window: 10–15 W white LED, 20–25 cm above leaves, 10–12 hr daily.
• Mixed rosettes on a dim shelf: 15–25 W at 20–30 cm over ~25–30 cm square.
• Cacti you want compact/colourful: 20–40 W at 20–30 cm over 30–40 cm square.

Write-offs: USB strips (1–5 W), “equivalent” bulb claims without real wattage, blurple drama, app-controlled mood lights. If it’s <10 W total, it’s décor, not horticulture. Use 4000–6500 K white LEDs, run 10–12 h on a $10 timer, and angle light at the plants, not the wall. After oil sprays (neem), keep out of harsh sun/lamps for 24–48 h.

You’ll know it’s right when rosettes stay tight, pigments hold, and cacti keep firm ribs/spines instead of turning into green candles.

Watering That Doesn’t Backfire

Think thorough soak followed by a true dry-down. Water until it streams from the drainage hole, then wait until the top 5–7 cm is dry and the pot feels lighter. In Melbourne summers that might be 7–10 days; in winter 3–4 weeks (sometimes longer). Terracotta dries faster; plastic holds moisture longer; gritty mixes dry faster than peaty ones.

Water quality: Rainwater is great. Most Aussie tap water is fine; if you see white crust on soil/pot rims, you’re building salts—leach by watering heavily 2–3× in a row to flush. Avoid household “softened” water (sodium).

Read texture, not calendars. Wrinkly/leathery generally means “drink me”—if roots are healthy. Soft/translucent means “too wet (or cold + wet)”—pause, unpot, check roots.

Mix & Pot: Air Over Mush

Healthy roots need oxygen. Your mix should be fast-draining and gritty—visible particles (pumice, scoria, perlite) that create permanent pores so water rushes through and air remains.

Starting points:

• True arids & many cacti (Echinopsis, Gymnocalycium, columnars): 60–70% mineral + 30–40% quality organic.
• Soft succulents (Haworthia, Gasteria, many Aloe hybrids): 40–60% mineral, remainder organic.
• Mesembs (Lithops/Conophytum): ultra-gritty, shallow sips, long gaps.

Squeeze test: moisten a handful; if it ribbons or smears like batter, cut in more mineral until it crumbles.

Top-dressings: loose gravel is fine; remove glued pebbles—they trap moisture and suffocate crowns.

Pot choices: always a drainage hole. Treat hole-less ceramics as cachepots (inner nursery pot + empty the outer after watering). Terracotta helps chronic over-waterers; plastic helps tiny pots that dry in a day. Size up slowly (1–2 cm wider than the root ball). Shallow, wide pots suit rosettes; tall columnars need a stable footprint.

Repot when the mix slumps, roots circle, or the plant wobbles. Do it in spring–early summer; set crowns a touch high; hold water 3–5 days so micro-wounds seal.

Feeding & Seasons (Timing Beats Big Doses)

Use light, complete nutrition in growth seasons (roughly Sept–Apr in southern Aus). Monthly is plenty; dilute until it looks like weak tea is a helpful cue. In winter, ease right back or pause unless your setup is warm and very bright. Heavy organic feeds in a cold room invite fungus gnats and sour soil.

Chasing flowers on cacti? Aim for compact spring/summer growth plus autumn day–night temperature swings. A dry, sunny winter stint (brightest indoor window or rain-sheltered outdoor position) often flips the bud switch.

Fixing Problems Without Panic

When something’s off, audit roots first—that habit saves more plants than any bottle.

• Wrinkled but firmish: soak and reassess in 48–72 h if roots are white/tan and crisp.
• No improvement / roots brown or missing: trim to healthy tissue, air-dry to callus (thin bits ~1–2 d; thick stems 7–10 d), restart on barely damp gritty mix; be stingy with water until rooted.
• Soft / translucent / collapsing: rot—unpot immediately, cut to firm tissue, callus in airy shade, restart dry.
• Corking vs pests: corking (barky tan) low on older cacti is normal. Scale/mealy = shells or cotton in crevices; dab with isopropyl alcohol, then re-check weekly (eggs hatch). Quarantine new plants 2–3 weeks to avoid importing problems.
• Fungus gnats: symptom of damp, fine mixes. Dry longer, boost mineral fraction, and use sticky traps while conditions improve.
• Red/purple hues: often harmless sun/cool response. If growth stalls and colour deepens fast, ease light slightly and mind cold drafts.
• Safety: Euphorbia latex irritates skin/eyes; wear gloves. Opuntia glochids are tiny barbs—use tools, not fingers. After oil sprays, shelter from hard sun/lamps for 24–48 h.
• Airflow & humidity: These are not terrarium plants (Echeveria especially). Gentle airflow and normal household humidity keep leaf axils dry and rot at bay.
• Temperature guardrails: Bring tender succulents in by 2–4 °C; shade glass setups above ~35 °C at midday.

Propagation & Repot Wisdom (Just Enough to Succeed)

Leaves (Echeveria/Grapto types): twist a healthy leaf cleanly, callus 2–5 d, lay on gritty mix; lightly moisten the medium, not the leaf. Pot once roots and a baby rosette form.
Offsets/pups (Haworthia, Gasteria, many cacti): tease away with some roots, callus 1–2 d, pot and water sparingly until anchored.
Stems (String of Pearls, Euphorbia, columnar cacti): clean cut, longer callus for thick stems, start almost dry. Hygiene (sterile blade) matters more than hormones.

Melbourne/VIC Notes (How to Adjust Elsewhere)

Winter: Indoors, push plants to your brightest glass; outdoors, many enjoy full winter sun if kept dry and out of icy wind.
Summer: Great light, but watch noon on glass—give 2–4 h of midday shade for thin leaves or fresh repots.
Apartments: Orientation beats window count. One honest north-facing pane > three south-facing ones. If you’ve only got south, cluster Haworthia/Gasteria on the sill and give light-hungry species a proper lamp.

The Short Version You’ll Actually Remember

• Put plants closer to the best light you own (harden in over 1–2 weeks); add real wattage if needed and keep lamps 20–30 cm away for 10–12 h.
• Soak thoroughly, then wait until the top 5–7 cm is dry and the pot feels light.
• Use a gritty, uniform mix (no drainage layers) and a pot with a hole.
• Feed lightly in spring–summer; pause in winter unless it’s warm and bright.
• Check roots first whenever something’s off; quarantine new arrivals.
• Set those and your plants do the rest—compact, colourful, calm.